Just posted this message to our "Double Bubble Recovery" Dual Recovery Anonymous Usergroup on MSN:

My Father "changed" when I was 8 years old, later I learned it was chronic depression, my Dad medicated himself every night with Alcohol and instantly changed personality, when sober he was stern and withdrawn, my Dad was a very honest person and I respect his memory, his Grandmother, my Great Grandmother was a flaming religious fanatic and probably bi polar (I remember her she died when I was 10..we were scared of her). No one to "blame", probably thousands have grown up in more dysfunctional situations. I came to realize my parents taught me basic moral values and tried to raise me as best they could. I wasted years "blaming others" for my failures and finally had to hit bottom, both in Alcohol and Chemical Dependency and Emotionally (was hospitalized 5 times due to my denial of being a "manic depressive"). Stick with the "winners" in the 12 Step Groups, those who cope, hope and have a psitive outlook on recovery and remember is but One Day at a Time. Medication, I believe is a personal issue between a person and their pdoc and one can always find another Doctor for a second opinion on medication issues if things don't be seem to be working out. AA and NA'ers have "been down" and can teach you how to "stay up" Sobriety works and chemical sobriety leads to emotional sobriety. I just went through a "downslide" and am grateful for all of you out there to listen to my ramblings, since you understand.